features under the category of PERSONALITY because I think I am a real “personality”. I mean I don’t have any followers at all but I figure if they feature me I will become famous. So I emailed the part of the website that takes nominations but it seems to be broken because it seems to be asking me for a dollar. And i mean i really think if I am recommending myself for the best blog it should give me a cute cat sticker as a GIFT and not expect me to be such a good blog and give them money or a reward.And I mean it’s confusing too because i want to be at the top of the list but i keep scrolling down and it says show more and my blog is not coming up and it should be a the top.Instead theres “Daily Does of My MInd” and “Peppermint” at the top and I mean just because people read there blogs doesn’t mean they shouldn’t read mine and i mean give other blogs a chance. But in this dog eats dog world I will beat these girls at their own game so I think I’ll take some pointers from them.  

Daily Doze of my Mind has under her blog picture: 

“People say I’m just another pretty face, but they think differently after reading what I have to say.” 

And then inside her blog, Daily Doze says rather defensively

I’ll bitch, whine, talk shit about the things you might like, laugh, be dumb, embarrassing, pointless posts, and many things you might not approve. Don’t let me hear you be talking shit to your friends about how annoying I am.. cos’ you know what ? You don’t have to click on this page. You didn’t have to sit on your computer on shehlovee.com , You can google “Why Am I such a jerk ? ” if you’d like. Don’t come on here, then tell your friends how I’m so dramatic.. and annoying. Cos’ to be honest, some how YOU WERE INTERESTED IN MY THOUGHTS, MY MIND, THE WAY I SEE THINGS, so.. you wanted it. If you don’t like the shit I post, don’t fucking read it. Plain & Simple. Don’t come on this blog, Don’t click on my post, Don’t look for those words that are on your computer screen. Don’t read, those words that explain my thoughts. Don’t need to talk shit. Give yourself a reason to stfu. Don’t give me BS. I hear too much of it anyways, funny how I never hear it straight from the person themselves.. oh yeah.. COS YOU NEVER EVEN HUNG OUT WITH ME. LOL wow. Thanks for hating. I’ll still love you.

So I’m not so sure why she wants to tell everyone DON’T CLICK TO MY BLOG and then they all do anyway and plus in a lot of spots she asks people to recommend her. But when i look at her blog I can see what she does like to do is post a lot of photos which probably makes her a big personality:

And then I noticed that Peppermint has at her blog:

pauli(na). 17. costa rican. dreamer. bookworm.

♥ photography. harry potter. books. horses. skins. glee. film-making. gone with the wind. disney.world history. 

But I mean how can peppermint say she is such a bookhorse when there isn’t a single piece of writing on her blog and just pictures? 

So i think after examining these popular blogs that i will really have to up my game and find other ways to get followers. I mean I could put up a lot of pictures of myself and i think that’s a good idea because i have a great personality but since I’m so much like david foster wallis i should also find some other literary way. And I think that really the best way to do that is figure out my own Neche.

So now that my own publishing career has taken off, and I didn’t need a man to do it, I’m ready to throw myself out there as a published writer. I mean, i found this website that tells you what famous writers you are like and it told me I am like a famous man called David Foster Wallis! And it seems Wallis was so precious that he is already dead like a real genius. 

It’s probably a good thing then that I can carry on the mantel for David but I will try to make my own stamp on it and remain alive.

Well, as I sit here at my apple laptop at the New York magazine Offices, I really do feel like my career is turning out. No offense, but my first day as an intern was only a week ago and because of my special know-how I already got a promotion!  But I won’t even brag about that, girls, because I really think the moral of my promotion is that I can tell the difference between nature vs nurture! Let me explain…LOL

But seriously,one of the great things about my new career is that I am learning more about new cultures and how nature brings us so many different ‘culture shocks’ and in my NYC life I am meeting new friends and obviously I am getting more popular because of it! 

But I guess even for a confident girl like me, a first day of my successful career can be nerve-wracking.

Like, yesterday when I showed up at the office for my very first day and a nice boy called Raymundo Fernando was there to greet me (and he is definitely a trendy and important friend to have in your career!) but like, I couldn’t even understand Raymundo LOL! He was all like hewwohunnywhadunchafawwowmeuspsahs and I was like HUH? LOL! I was all like, umm we don’t have so much of that hipster language where I am from LOL.

So Raymundo brought me to the elevator (we are on the 57th floor OMG!) and when we were in the elevator there was a lady who at first I totally thought was Oprah! (but it turned out she was “Bonnie” from her cleaner name-tag.)  And Raymundo was all like looking at my shoes and saying they were “weellyweelly sahh nahhhs. ah theymah sahz?” but I guess I didn’t know what to say but then Bonnie was looking at Raymundo and before she got out of the elevator she said something about ‘mmm don’t tell me that nature verses nurture bullshit cuz don’t make no difference we all together’ and something about accepting Queens.  And I really thought that was probably Oprah’s spirit shining down on me for guidance in my new career path and telling me I should be successful like Raymundo  and not live in Queens like Bonnie the cleaner.  So i though I really better remember how ‘nature verses nurture’ or i might end up as a cleaner like Bonnie. 

So then Raymundo got me to my apple computer desk (like the Teen vogue on The Hills! OMG!) and told me to “fandagood awtacles ahntweetdem” and it was funny because all throughout the day Raymundo would ask me did I fandagoodawtaclesahntweetdem and I would look at him and chuckle because I really think that the best thing to do for foreign people is to make them feel like you are laughing at their joke.  

But the next day I really did feel the pressures of having an important career, and there was no other blond intern friend like Whitney on The Hills, and because Raymundo was waring a lot tighter pants and got angry at me and said “ahdonot hav tahm fawdis ahmahgawd. Waywawawdafakantweets?” and I really was getting worried now and ready to cry or ready to call Mr. Fellner and tell him to get me a better favor.

But right then, when I thought of Mr. Fellner, that is when realised he sometimes spoke in a precious way like some artists do, and that is probably all Raymundo was trying to do. So I really tried to use my brain and of course it struck me that Raymundo wanted me to “find the best articles and treat them”. I mean that is totally what Oprah would do if it was her show. So right away I like chuckled and said “i’ll get them right away!” and I think that Raymundo was ok because he was breathing more deeply.

Well, I reallised then and there that i was hired for the right job and that it was a good thing Mr. Fellner gave me the favor of that credit card.  So I went on the New York Magazine website and found the names of all the staff and ran to Barneys to source the treats. And Bonnie the cleaner even helped me to deliver treats to all the best writers (and I made sure that she and Raymundo got treats too) and of course all of the top editors!

Well, it turned one of the top career ecsecutives, Mr. E, was super impressed with the cartier watch and called me to his office to get to know me better. And Mr. E seemed intersted in my career and asked if I minded late nights and later he even took me out and “took one look at me to know that i belong in PR” and that “i know how to work a room”. And then a few days later Mr. E invited me to work more closely with him and that is how I got promoted.

Which really goes to show, girls, that a little ‘nurture’ can go a long way with helping nature and the course of your career. I mean fate keeps on happening to me and its not a coincidence. 

And I decided to ask Bonnie to read this blog and comment and did she think it was insparational enough to be in oprah’s book club?

So i realised yesterday I really need to get my career moving. I mean i feel like I totally wasted too much time on Milford the self publisher so straight away I called up a few magazine and told them how they should give me a job.  Which was really hard because it turns out that thousands of other bright girls seem to have been doing that for a while.  But I knew the Big Apple was going to be so competative and that is why i used my secret weapon (i can’t tell you what it is because it wouldn’t be a weapon anymore no wait i mean a secret lol) Except maybe I should tell you a little about “How I Became an Intern at New York Magazine”

Well, a few years ago i remember being a high school student at raritan NJ and we took a field trip to the metropolitan museum of art. I was so anamored with the art (i really have a strong artistic temper) that it turns out I strayed a little from the class lol. 

Well so anyway it turned out that I stumbled into a ‘private event’ in one of the rooms of the met and that is wear I ran into Mr. Fellner who it looked like had just accidentally fallen onto the face of a man called I forget. Well, Mr. Fellner was really embarrassed that I had seen the accident between him and the other man and he was shouting “why are you in here” and other bad words. But pretty soon Mr. Fellner realised probably through my outfit that I am a smart girl and that smart girls needed a career some day or some other kind of future favor.  So he gave me his card and said if I forgot he would give me a favor. 

So I called up Mr. Fellner and told him that I could remember the thing with the man in the Met and did he remember the favors?

And that is “How I Became an Intern at New York Magazine”

Well, it really has been a while since I’ve given myself a chance to put my thoughts to paper. I’ve been super busy pursuing my career these days and there’s nothing an ambitious career oriented girl can do to avoid that, right?

So, the self-publisher I had mentioned (i’ll call him Milford from now on because we really have to protect identities on the web and thats only his last name) so the self publisher Milford was giving me good advice on my diery entries and we were really getting to know each other better in ‘the process’. One thing Milford always says is that most of writing is really about ‘the process’ and for him that’s the thing that matters. Which is funny because once Milford starts the process I usually have to end up spending the night. There really is a lot to publishing tho, and Milford even has his own Laser Jet which sounds pretty expensive!!

But like, even though I really thought Milford could help me become a published author I was wrong. It turns out that no one has ever bought a book from him except his sister and that you can’t even find his book of stomp poetry in barnes and nobles. And like I guess it turns out that I am more of a published author than Milford because I have an internet connection which he has not yet put up in his apartment (though maybe he should consider selling his laser jet). 

Like I really felt like Milford deceived me and I”ve spent too much time with him over the past few weeks. I mean he can’t just bring me to the park every time. And a girl can’t just pin her hopes on the first guy that comes along, right?? lol After all, now that I live in Brooklyn there must be a lot of options lol

So I’ve decided that as an independent career women I have to think more for myself and look out for the more successful men. I owe it to myself. 

And I couldn’t help but wonder…what would Carrie Bradshaw do, or type into her apple laptop?

Sometimes I wonder to myself: What is the reason that colors have to mean so much to people? Like, red.  Why is it so red?

Red is pashionate but only if you make it so. 

My friend Amy and I went to Paris yesterday (not the city unfortunately!!!!).

Amy has been my best friend ever since high school in Raritan, NJ and we moved to the city together ( Amy, make a tumblr too..are you even reading this?!!! LOL). So just sitting there getting our manipedis yesterday we got to thinking about our lives and trying to compare it to The Hills and the general craziness of it all and it dawned on me that what we really were talking about was the dreaded notion of “self esteem”. 

Self. Esteem. Two words about beauty that can just be so ugly.

But self esteem isn’t necessarily completely about your looks. (Even though it would be silly to pretend that’s not most of it and really if you asked anyone they’d admit that.)

When I was in high school in Raritan, self esteem was something I couldn’t help but wonder about everyday. What was I going to become when I was in my twenties?

If you look at what happened to Heidi Montag, it’s sad. But that is not what I want to become, like any sane girl! The path to fame shouldn’t just come because you got surgery and you should have to work for it and do something worthy, like write a book (Just ask Lauren, I guess!)

Which is I why I’m meeting Roman again tomorrow night because I really hope he can help me turn this blog eventually into a book. He told me he’s a self-publisher, which rocks, and I’m already on my way with three lengthy posts written so far.

Which really proves, girls, that if you hang on to your inner (not outer!) self esteem you can grow into the real person that your meant to be.